this is me in my new bathing suit<MAC LOOKS BACK

(sandy feet models her new bathing suit for the quickcam)

Dear sandy feet,

I read something recently about the mayor of an Italian seaside resort who sparked a so-called "Bikini War" with a reported plan to ban "ugly" women from walking around town in swimsuits.

I have to tell you that this scenario is like my worst nightmare. I really worry that people who see me in my swimsuit are shaking their heads and muttering "there oughtta be a law..."

Do you think this is the start of some sort of movement?

-Worried

Well, I did a little research and found the story to which you were referring. Andrea Guglieri, mayor of the northwestern Riviera resort of Diano Marina, hasn't issued any official decree yet but he has been quoted making ominous threats about banishing "flabby buttocks and cellulite thighs" from city streets. He goes on to add that he thinks ugly women in bikinis detract from the natural beauty of the area and in fact hurt the tourism industry.

It kinda makes you wonder how this important issue failed to come up in our own recent city elections, doesn't it?

I realize that here on the Island we have a new mayor who has not expressed an opinion (as far as I know) one way or the other about ugly women in swimsuits -- but I would be very surprised if Mayor Ed made the issue a high priority. Would such a law bring more tourists here? Let me put it this way: Would you return to a town that had given you a ticket for public display of flab? Me either. I don't know, maybe in Italy the hard-bodies out-number the pleasingly plump -- but I kinda doubt it. Until that happens, I think we're safe.

Dear Ms. Feet,

Now that summer is finally really and truly here, I have been looking all over to find a copy of your book on how to build sandcastles.... with no luck. Where can a score a copy?

Have you been looking in the sale piles and remainder bins? Those are the only places you can find them any more, sad to say. However, if you are fluent in Japanese there is some good news: the Sons of the Beach book, Sand Castles Step-by-Step is scheduled to be published in Japan this summer; in fact, the publisher is even talking about flying Walter and I out there in August to build sand castles and promote the book. We would probably let them. In fact, we are scrambling to get out passports in order!

And for our many friends who have not been brushing up on their Japanese - we hope to have a brand new (English) edition out within the next year, as well as a video illustrating the whole process. Keep watching this space for more details!

In the meantime - you can still pick up some free sandcastling instruction every Sunday on the beach in front of Boomerang Billy's at the Surf Motel. Please Note: I do not cover everything that I do in the private lessons, but a little instruction is all some people need to get started. Anyone who has had the lesson is also invited to come use the carving tools and pick up some more pointers.

MORE FREEBIES AT BOOMIE'S - Steve "the Grateful DuneHead" Mutter is giving free stunt and power kite flying demonstrations twice daily Tues.-Sun. on the beach at Boomerang Billy's, sponsored by Windchaser's Kite Shop. If you've ever had any interest in flying one of there babies, this could be your chance.

Webbed Feet: a few interesting links for your net-surfing pleasure...

It's summertime on the internet and these feets are making tracks for the beach.... if not the real thing then at least a virtual facsimile. Too busy to hit the surf this summer? Then let the beach come to you via your computer!

BEACH PARTIES ON THE WEB

You're invited to a Virtual Beach Party !

"As you walk up the dunes, you can hear the sounds of surf and happy voices. The sand is hot under your feet. The sand is also brown and squishy under your feet! Eh! Doggie dew! Yuck! I bet it was that dog over there. You decide you would smell better if you washed your feet and had a swim. As you swim out,enjoying the warm water, you are nearly run over by some boardhead on a windsurfer. Half drowned, you are rescued by the lifeguard..."

....and so on and so forth. Each link takes you to to several other interesting places. I had lots of fun and fully intend to go back at the very next opportunity.

Next, check out "chuck'space" where you will find a very elaborate drawing of a beach scene chock-full of images you can click on. I'm not gonna even try to describe how cool this site is, you are just going to have to go see for yourself.

Last - but not least - we have "Amazin's Fun Spot" Come see "Amazin' Walter's Ego at Work" -- and a few other things of local and universal interest. That's right, Amazin' Walter, (Director of Fun, Grand Pooh-Bah of the Sons of the Beach, etc. etc.) has his own web site now and he did it all by himself -- with a little help from his web guru, of course.

Want to have your website featured here? E-mail me your URL... and happy surfing!

There are five (5) ways to submit your questions/comments for future Ask Sandy columns: In person; by phone (761-6222) or fax (761-8930); the US Postal System (box 2694,spi,78597) and E-mail: (sandyfeet@sat.net). Visit the SOB Sandcastle Page (http://www.unlitter.com) for tips on sandcastling, contest info, recent Ask Sandy columns, and my reviews of local businesses.

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