Dear sandy feet,
My lovely daughter is on her way down to South Padre Island for her first spring break without me there to sign the credit card receipts, make sure she eats right, and see that she gets to sleep at a decent hour.
As you might imagine, I'm a bit worried.
Would you be so kind as to reprint this letter in your column to remind her and who knows how many other sons and daughters that they have anxious moms at home? (To save my daughter embarrassment, I have changed her name to that of a well-known TV sitcom character.) Thanks!
Dear Kelly Bundy,
Remember a long time ago when you stretched out your little hand to touch the hot burner and I said NO very loud and saved you from burning yourself? And remember that motorcycle guy you wanted to date? How I said NO -- and how he crashed and burned with his new girlfriend on the back of his bike and now they're both in wheelchairs for life?
You've heard that big loud NO enough times that it should be firmly embedded in your psyche. I hope. You're a big girl now, and if you want to drink too much, sleep around, pierce your bellybutton or get a tattoo, there is nothing I can do to stop you. I can certainly make your life living hell when you get home, but right now only you can tell yourself NO.
Don't do anything stupid. But if you must -- for heaven's sake stay close to your friends, go to a reputable parlor and use protection. And someday -- when we are both a little bit older - we'll exchange spring break stories.
Dear Ms. Feet,
I have lived here on the island for over a decade, and every year at this time I get an overwhelming feeling of dread as I watch my peaceful little island paradise transform itself into a noisy gross-out contest -- practically overnight! Why do we continue to subject ourselves to these bouts of seasonal madness? Is there no escape for the peace-seeking local?
Well, I hear Costa Rica is nice this time of year...
Even if leaving the Island is not an option, it is not terribly difficult to put some distance between the party and you. Like the wild animals some of them emulate, spring breakers like to travel in hordes, so all you have to do is go where they are not, i.e. 20 miles up the beach or the Coral Reef Lounge.
Why do we subject ourselves to this every year? because it's exciting! New shops and restaurants opening daily! Tribes of girls in short skirts on the streets! Frat boys muscling kegs up the beach! Dance floors jumping! Guitars screaming! Why -- with all the hormones zinging around loose -- even the old-fogiest of us locals can't help feeling a little frisky!
Of course, the welcome blast of outside capital into the local economy could be a factor as well --
Recent surfing expeditions have brought me to some interesting spring break-related sites on the the World Wide Web, such as http://www.cybersuperstores.com/playboy/spring.html - where for just $19.95 you can order your own copy of Playboy's Girls of Spring Break -- "Everything you've dreamed about college girls comes true at Spring Break. And now, on this torrid video version of one of PLAYBOY'S wildest pictorials, catch America's most dazzling coeds at their hard-partying best. On the beaches, at poolside and in the ultra clubs of South Padre Island, they're stoked with Spring Fever and baring their spirits in a blaze of youthful hedonism."
For a close up and personal look at one co-ed's SPI spring break experience, point your browser to http://uts.cc.utexas.edu/~susanw/final/galli/spi.html --See Susan and the girls from UT's pictures from spring break `95. Gee, they look like they're having fun!
Want to have your spring break pictures featured in an on-line spring break year book? Go to http://www.springbreak.com/submit.html for more information.
E-mail me your URL to get your web-site featured here... and happy surfing!
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